Say What You Need to Say
A very short to-do list. | Dear Me: Notes to self Week 1
PROMPT: Write a letter to your future self.
Dear me 20 years in the future,
I have a hard time imagining the future, let alone my place in it.
You may remember, future me, that I took a writing class in February 2024 where we were supposed to be writing stories about the revolution, stories about how we want to see the world. I told the instructor, author Shingai Kagunda, that I didn’t know how my story should end, what life after revolution looks like. And she responded: It’s the job of the writer to imagine the ending.
My imagination isn’t that big at the moment of writing this. I don’t know if we’ve stopped all the genocides. I don’t know if we’ve toppled capitalism and created a universal income and healthcare. I don’t know if we cooled down the planet or if we figured out what’s going on with Boeing.
I don’t imagine a lot about the future but I do plan for it. I’m a hope for the best, plan for the rest type of gal and while I struggle with the “hope for the best” part, I’m a passionate planner. I suppose I write to my future self all the time, considering I make a To-Do list daily, even on days when I don’t have to work. I get satisfaction crossing off “wash dishes” or “drink water” or even “poop” on the note page.
But like I was saying, I can’t yet imagine what my life is like in the future. But future me, if you’re reading this, I do have something I want you To-Do:
Say the thing you need to say.
Again, I don’t know how the world will be different for me 20 years from now. But, I hope that I’m a little different, in that I’ve learned how to speak up for myself. And if by chance I haven’t lived up to that imagining yet, consider this is a note from me to me to give it a try.
I always say it’s not too late to live the life you’ve always imagined for yourself. I hope the me reading this still believes that’s true and if you do, know that even now, it’s still not too late to make a change and start communicating and advocating for yourself.
Stop talking yourself out of things and start talking out loud.
And on the off chance that future me is already a master communicator, then I want to encourage you to keep going, keep saying the things. I hope I’m somewhere out there saying all the things I needed and wanted to say without reservation and also without malice. I hope I feel freer, bolder, and closer to the people I care about, able to show up as my authentic self.
Isolation and shutting down are practiced skills for me developed in childhood. They’re taking a long time to unlearn but I hope future me is seeing the progress of present me’s efforts. I hope future me isn’t afraid to express her needs, I hope future me remembers it’s okay to say you want something. It’s okay to say you feel something. I hope you know that you’re worth demanding a particular type of attention and care. I hope you stop doubting yourself. Stop talking yourself out of things and start talking out loud.
I love you so much regardless of what you’re doing. And I hope the world you live in is a little better than the one I’m writing in. I know things change with every little step we take in a different direction. I imagine you’ve been making strides.
Sincerely you,
-Jolie 🌸
This entry was written for WEEK 1 of the Finding the Right Words May Challenge under the theme “DEAR ME: Notes to Self.” Follow along using the graphic above and write about whatever comes to mind when you fill in the blank. Share with me using the tag #FTRW or email me at jdoggett9 [at] gmail.
There’s no wrong way to journal. You just gotta find the right words. Happy Writing!